Doesn't play well with others?

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By David A

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  • 16 Replies
  1. David A

    David A
    Greenville, NC

    Honesty:

    I'm not a "good" golfer.  I haven't broken 100....yet.  I lose more balls per round then I want to admit.  If I ever put my good shots all together and begin to minimize the horrible ones ,I might finally do these Titleist clubs some justice.  The problem I have is I don't want to play a round with anyone right now.  I'm embarrassed of my current game and I don't want to slow anyone /any group up with me walking from one side of the green to the other looking for that ball I just sent screaming over the hole.  I stop keeping score around the 12th hole...adding big numbers was never my thing.  I start keeping a memory of my good shots and imagining what would have been my score, minus that one in the water, the few in the woods...etc.

    I am currently taking lessons and I am getting better, I am,  just not confident enough to play with others.

    Now saying all of that, let me say this....I LOVE THIS GAME!  I'd rather be on the course looking for my lost ball than anywhere else.  I hit enough good\great shots to keep me hooked, thinking I might actually be good one day....breaking 100, 90...begin to sniff the low 80's one day?  

    Anyone else feel like this ever?

    BTW,

    I play Titleist gear exclusively...so I know the gear is not the issue, it's me.  (Hoping after posting this, Titleist doesn't tell me to stop playing their clubs and balls and directs me to return them ASAP)

  2. PRO V

    PRO V
    golf course

    David, your love of the game is the #1 requirement in playing golf (in my humble opinion).  I played with someone the other day who was technically proficient and a great player, but a zero in the personality department.  I'll never play with him again.  But if you love what you do, it's contagious.  You can golf with me anytime!  Enjoy the journey, David!

  3. Speedy

    Speedy
    Newmarket, NH

    Hey David,

    Vurich said it best..

    I'll share this..   Last year I was going through a phase where I didn't think I was good enough to play with certain a group..  When i went out, i stunk and felt like I didn't belong..  Great group of guys, great players, best sense of humor you could ask for (the trash talking can be relentless at times) but didn't feel like i belonged b/c of my game..  I was at the point where I didn't think they would ask me to play again and to be honest I would've been fine with it..  I was wrong... I've now played a few rounds with them and it's been a blast ever since..  Every one of those guys in the group just kept telling me, "relax, have fun", "enjoy the game", "keep your head up", etc.  Every positive sentiment you can think of has really helped me relaxed therefor enjoying the game more... Most importantly, i was having a lot more fun, no negative thoughts...

    I have met A LOT of amazing people through golf, it's been a blessing to be honest..  And I think you'll meet some great people here within the TT community, I know I have..  I think you need to find the right person to play with, it's good to have a "support" person with you..  I think it would truly help your game.. 

    In the end it's not about the score, it's about having fun and enjoying the beautiful game they call golf...

    I wish you the best with your game Dave and if you're ever in New England, i'll play a round with you...

    Cheers

     

  4. Joe D

    Joe D
    Minooka, IL

    vurich said:

    David, your love of the game is the #1 requirement in playing golf (in my humble opinion).  I played with someone the other day who was technically proficient and a great player, but a zero in the personality department.  I'll never play with him again.  But if you love what you do, it's contagious.  You can golf with me anytime!  Enjoy the journey, David!

    Well said Vurich

    Dave you love to play so tee it up and have fun.

  5. Carl T

    Carl T
    Little Rock, AR

    Hang in there DA. I don't know of anyone who first started this game and was better at first and then got worst every time he played there after. Taking lessons is the best thing you can do. Also I have found that what you learn from a instructor may take weeks to sink in and comprehend. Take one step at a time and forget about score. If possible if you hit a bad shot, drop another ball down and see if you can hit the second one better. Of course you don't won't to do that if there are players right behind you waiting. Believe me there are other golfers out there that are just like you. Try to find them as misery like company. You will get better but it just takes time. You have to crawl before you walk.
  6. Team Titleist Staff

    Hi David,

    I think a lot of us can relate to this and have gone through stretches, whether it was when we were first learning the game or making a swing change or just a cold streak, where we've struggled a bit on the course. But just like you, we all love the game and just can't get enough of it.

    One thing that has helped my game is to mentally commit to having a good time on the course and enjoying the round no matter what the score. I think you're approach is spot on to take mental pictures of the good shots. You should check out some of Dr. Bob Rotella's books. He talks a lot about how the right mental approach can really help as well.

    In terms of being embarrassed, I've played with golfers of all skill levels and had some of the best days with golfers who have never broken 100. So, I say don't worry about that and just go out there, keep pace and play your game. 

    And most importantly, have fun! 

    - Mike

    P.S. Thank YOU for trusting Titleist.

  7. You are entitled to the course and to playing the game. Enjoy it no matter how it goes. Certainly there is course etiquette and all of that, but don't let the state of your game inhibit you from getting out there and playing. It's up to your playing companions to adjust to those in their grouping...and for them to be an encouraging partner.

    You've got this, David!

    Paul

  8. Michael JC

    Michael JC
    Orwell, VT

    David A, been there, done that, sent bladed balls in many directions, have hit misguided hosel rockets into Ravi Shanker Land.

    But it is those purely struck shots that go where you want them to go, that keep bringing  you back to the course. Find a time that the course is not busy, late in the day, maybe, when you can play at your own pace. That way if you mis-hit one, drop another and take it from there. Some times it is best to just golf and not worry about score. Those good swings are in there, you just have to find them!

    Good luck! Fairways and Greens!!

  9. Sam E

    Sam E
    San Diego, CA

    David,

    Try plaing the afternoon twilight rounds, it tends to draw more casual golfers so you can relax

  10. John M

    John M
    Asheville, North Carolina

    Military

    You're doing the smart thing by taking lessons. One thing about golf that I really love and that our character is revealed out there on the course. You are not your score. All the best. 

  11. Mike B

    Mike B
    Duluth, GA

    David A,

    Hang in there . . . I can certainly understand why you might feel that way, but know the vast majority of people only really pay attention to their own game and don't mind at all how anyone else in their group plays provided they are keeping pace.  Although I am a lower handicapper (having played all my life), some of the most fun I have had on the golf course is playing with people who may shoot higher scores but know how to enjoy themselves and don't take things too seriously.  It sounds like you have a pretty good sense of humor and would be welcome in my group anytime.

    Keep hitting enough good ones to keep you coming back!

  12. andy r

    andy r
    Cheshire, CT

    Welcome Dave, you love the game and that is the most important thing because this game can drive you to curse it and profess your love to it all in the same round.

    First thing is to stick with taking lessons  even if at first it doesn't appear as if they are helping , eventually they will.

    Practice chipping & putting as much as possible.

    In terms of playing be sure to play from the proper set of tees, I have seen many beginners jump right to the blue tees.

    Find a local 9 hole course and play as early in the morning if possible, I have found that is when courses are less populated and on occasion I am able to play two balls when no one else is around.

    Good luck with your game !

  13. Aloha Bruce

    Aloha Bruce
    Sunnyvale, CA

    Dave,

    As long as you enjoy the game, don't get mad, can keep up the pace and have good golf etiquette then it doesn't matter how you play people will enjoy playing with you. If you're ever in NorCal we can tee it up!

  14. David A

    David A
    Greenville, NC

    Thanks for the encouragement everyone!

  15. Michael T

    Michael T
    Winter Garden, FL

    You need to hang in there!!!   

    When I first started playing (because my dad basically dragged me onto a course at RTJ)  I was aweful.   I don't remember making a par the first four to five months.   I avoided everybody, played rounds late in the day and wasn't having much fun even though I was hooked.

    Then I got paired with some guys that belonged to a private course and they were awesome.   Not only did they slow me down since I use to run up to the ball and swing like a hockey player again and again, but they gave me good advice going forward which I owe the three of them still to this day.

    The greatest thing besides the game itself is the friends you'll make and the stories (some exaggerated) you can share with others of those good or bad shots.  Bad are usually more funny.

    I play heavily in the Orlando area and sometimes you see people really give it to some of the local newbies just starting out.  Usually you'll see this on the range with people making comments like, "hope I'm not paired with him" blah blah blah.   It's usually the same guy making comments about my Titleist Staff Bag.   Which is why I keep course bag tags on my bag like shrunken heads from bets I've made with those very same people to shut them up.  

    Now I've approached local starters when I hear this crap on the range as I know how I felt in the past and they will pair less experienced players up with a few of us from time to time as I love playing with them because I've been there and don't mind. As long as your general pace of play is good, plus good greens etiquette just about anybody shouldn't have a problem.   Ask starters at your local who plays well plus usually is up to some antics.     Plus if the group behind has any comments usually a bomb using a 13 deg 3 wood off the first tee bet shuts them right up.

    Have fun and go make some new and crazy golf buds!

  16. Bob T

    Bob T
    East Otis, MA

    Even though your game may not be where you want it, It doesn't matter to most how you play.  It's the fact that you enjoy the game and playing with better golfers will help make you a better golfer. 

  17. Richard F

    Richard F
    Hutchinson, KS

    What all of these guys have said, I agree with. Don't know where you could find a better bunch  than T/T.

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